Worry

One thing that is interesting about being a teacher is how your work follows you everywhere you go.  You go home and you still have to plan or grade work.  You leave after a hard day and you cannot help but think about your students from time to time.  I went out with Ariel this weekend and saw one of my students who was out with his family.  It is just interesting because it is good, there is something very good about being involved in the lives of other people in such a way that you do not leave them and yet, there is something good about being able to disconnect from you work and just relax and be yourself.  I want to be better at doing that.  I spend too much time worrying about things.  That is something I want to focus on.

I've been thinking about this worry and anxiety that keeps me up at night.  I think it has something to do with not being able to say "no" very well.  I need to say "no" to some of my thoughts and I need to say "no" to some people in my life who have some very specific expectations for me.  I'm sure that it would be easier if I could just say no and not be so worried about what these other people were thinking.  I guess I need to have some dignity, that is what I need to make sure of.  I'm often too afraid of offending people.  It's something I need to work on.  I shouldn't be laying awake at night, it's not healthy.