beauty

What more, you may ask, do we want? … We do not want merely to see beauty, though, God knows, even that is bounty enough. We want something else which can hardly be put into words—to be united with the beauty we see, to pass into it, to receive it into ourselves, to bathe in it, to become part of it.
—C.S. Lewis, "The Weight of Glory"

Music + Brazil = Love. Love. Love.

Recently, I have fallen in love with Brazilian music.

what is good

I just wanted to say that what is good about living with others is that sometimes it is not as easy as living alone. It can be so much more convenient to live alone. Seriously. At the same time, what is good about living with others is that it is better than living alone. Living with others gives you many more reasons to celebrate, especially when you are able to work through the not easy parts, the result is something worth celebrating.

it's the principle of the thing

The president of Costa Rica, Oscar Arias, is going to act as the mediator between the Honduran leaders Manuel Zelaya and Roberto Micheletti. Hopefully, this will help find a solution to the crisis!

This morning, I listened to an interview with Ruben Blades where he gave his thoughts about what makes the situation in Honduras unusual. It is complicated for several reasons. One of those reasons is that there ought to be a legal way to remove an abusive leader but, apparently Honduras didn't have an impeachment process in its constitution, so they improvised their own way.

The very reason that there are different branches of government (executive, legislative, and judicial) is that they might be able to keep each other in check. I think that is what the legislative and judicial branches were trying to do in Honduras. The executive branch was getting out of control. Unfortunately, in the process of trying to keep the president from breaking the law, they broke the law. That kind of invalidates their actions. What a mess!

[Update: “America supports now the restoration of the democratically elected president of Honduras, even though he has strongly opposed American policies.” President Obama

Secretary of State Clinton did not actually say that America supports the restoration of Zelaya. She said that America is waiting to see what happens during the conversations with Arias.]

Can I just say that there are some really hard things going on in China right now as well, what a messed up world we live in.

what makes it worthwhile?

Last night some of my friends help put together a fantastic BBQ dinner at a local homeless shelter. It was a lot of work but, I think the guys at the shelter really appreciated it and were thankful.

Afterwards, one of my friends felt the let down that you get after you do something good for people who may or may not ever escape the trap of drugs, alcohol, and poverty. She wondered if there had been any real interactions and if just "hanging out" in that setting does any good at all. In some ways, I wish that mere acts of kindness would help people out of poverty but, unfortunately it doesn't work that way. That does not make the acts of kindness any less significant.

Even so, I think that the question, "What is the good of this?" is worth asking. I mean, seriously. If our intention was to help these guys, we probably didn't do much more than give them a really delicious meal. But, maybe that is enough. We don't have to fix their situation. Maybe our willingness to be present is good enough.

Isn't that [almost] all we want anyway? As I listened to my friend's discouragement --I realized that I felt the same way a week or so ago after we had a big party at our house. We had a good time, we shared good food, and had good people over but, afterwards, I felt a similar let down. I wondered what the good of that type of interaction is, I felt like all my conversations had been short and superficial, so, ok --yeah, we had a good time, but what is the value of that?

Maybe it is the same. We want people to be present in our lives. Sharing food and time is valuable. We can always work towards more meaningful interactions with people and towards more intentional conversations. What is it that makes an activity worthwhile? Is it something we can measure?

child poverty

I went to a hearing on the impact of the recession on childhood poverty. It was very interesting. To say the least. One of the most sobering facts that were mentioned during the hearing was that children who's families started out above the poverty line before a recession and fall under the poverty line during a recession end up with similar outcomes of productivity, education, and health as those who were in poverty the entire time --even if the families are able to improve their circumstances after the recession, those children do not recover as well. Isn't that interesting and sad?

oh Honduras!

I have been reading about what is happening in Honduras and I don't really think I am anyone to have a strong opinion. I don't really know more about it than anyone else. What makes it different for me is that my parents call Honduras home and maybe I care just a little bit more about what happens there because in some ways a little bit of me considers a little bit of Honduras home.

So, the deal is that they have removed their president in a very unusual (illegal?) way and now it is the whole world and Zelaya against Honduras. It's tough. I don't agree with just ousting a president, just like that... but, I also think that people need to listen to the "other side"... things are never quite as simple as they seem.

Dan Rosenheck wrote and article in the National Post, Everyone is wrong about Honduras, and I think that there might be some truth to that. I just saw another article written by Carlos Alberto Montaner (author of some pretty interesting books), Preventing a Honduran Bloodbath. Montaner writes "...if there is still something worse than the depressing spectacle of a freely elected president forced to leave his country at gunpoint, it is that same leader trying to force his way back in. If Zelaya returns, he will be arrested and charged with an array of crimes. His imprisonment will embarrass any who decide, irresponsibly, to accompany him on such a mad adventure."

I hope that this gets resolved; I do not envy those leaders who are trying to negotiate this situation. What are we going to do? Montaner suggests that, "The solution is to move forward with the general elections planned for November. It's a solution within everyone's reach: the candidates are already there, freely elected in open primaries, and both enjoy much popularity. Why plunge this society irresponsibly into a maelstrom of violence? Once the new government is selected, a government that enjoys the legitimacy generated by a democratic process, the Honduran people can push this lamentable episode into the past."

the soloist

I saw this movie last week and it has been on my mind ever since. Homelessness is an issue that I think about all the time. I intentionally seek to know the names of the homeless people that I see every day and I surround myself with people who love the homeless --more than I do.

I want to believe that merely treating people with dignity is a valuable contribution to the common good of all people and that for the thousands of people that might never escape the trap of poverty and homelessness, one person might feel the courage to seek help because someone affirmed them and treated them as a valuable person.

I have become less expectant of radical transformation since the days that I would go hang out on East Hastings in Vancouver, BC when I got to witness the incredible events that led to Trisha Baptie get off the streets through a simple relationship and a lot of other hard but good events.

I do believe transformation is possible, I believe there is hope for the most voulnerable, but what has changed is that I do not expect to be the catalyst for that change. I might get to help someone one day, I might not. I believe that I can be a friend along the journey. To be honest, that is all we really want sometimes anyway. I know I don't always want people to "help" me I just want someone to listen to me...

Even though it can be heartbreaking to befriend people who never get to escape the traps of poverty, I guess I could relate to "The Soloist". I don't know why sometimes things don't get fixed but, I guess the point is that none of us were really ment to be "soloists" we all need the suport of others to help us keep going and to make sense of it all.

Up

I just have to say that this is a great movie. It's funny how many people dream of adventure but never get around to it. I love Ellie in this movie. I can identify with her, sometimes I have a little too much enthusiasm. I guess I hope that I would be able to always embrace the simple things in my life and love them... but, I also hope that I'll get to have the adventures too! I wonder how many Ellie and Carl's there are out there...

time to evaluate

Something is wrong when I don't have time for reading, writing, praying, studying, listening, being informed, playing and appreciating silence and beauty.

At the same time, I'm grateful for community, friends, family, food, generosity, travel, being known, and journeying with others.

"I am a Panamanian"

I wrote my first journal when I was 7 years old. I kept it during the year that my family traveled through the United States. My parents just brought it to me this past weekend. It made me laugh because the first entry actually shows how little I've changed since then. The first thing I wrote in my journal was:

"I am a Panamanian. We left today."

Being from Panama and always "leaving" are two major themes in my life. So little has changed.

that was random

So, last night I went to dinner with some friends. I was sitting next to someone I had never met before so, we just chatted randomly for a while about where we're from, places we've traveled, languages we're interested in, etc.

During dinner we ended up talking about homelessness and I started telling him how I often find myself talking to homeless people that I pass by every day. I told him that I talk to them because I feel like they are my neighbors and I think it is good to talk to your neighbors!

It was an interesting conversation for being a first conversation with someone. He told me that he feels very uncomfortable talking to homeless people. They make him feel insecure and he always feels like they are trying to get something from him.

I looked at him and thought how odd it was that it makes me feel very different when I talk to homeless people. I feel like it is a simple act that affirms us as human beings and even though sometimes there are people who try to take advantage of us, often there are people who just want someone to talk to.

Obviously, there are people that I'm afraid to talk to and there are people that I cannot talk to because they might take advantage of me but, those are decisions that are made on a daily/individual basis. I don't just ignore people automatically because they are homeless.

Anyway, the thing is that as we were talking I told my new friend about these homeless people that I walk by everyday and that I asked them their names so that I could at least say good morning and say their name. I told him that yesterday a homeless man that I always walk by asked me as I was walking by why I never stopped to chat with him. I slowed down, I apologized and told him that I'd come early today so that I would have some time to chat with him.

So, anyway... this morning I stopped by and asked his name and learned a couple things about him. He told me that he ended up on the streets because he has Korsakoff's syndrome where he forgets everything every couple of days. He was nice and didn't ask me for anything, he just told me his story. So, after chatting with him I walked down through the park that I always walk through and said "Good morning" to Joe, who I always say good morning to and then, when I took three steps past Joe...

...someone was walking next to me and he said, "that was weird" and it was my friend from last night! I looked at him in disbelief. It was weird because he caught me in the very act of doing the very thing that we'd talked about the night before when we'd met. We sort of talked awkwardly and walked to our office buildings. It was so random! I wonder if my new friend and I will run into each other all the time now.

deeply intentional life together

I have had so many things going on in my heart and life right now. Everything from realizing how much I love being part of a community of hospitality, enjoying my parents, sunny days and hammocks, evenings with good music and friends, reflecting on changes in the past 10 years of my life, enjoying worshiping with other Christians, celebrating birthdays with good friends and other simply good things.

I am figuring out and stumbling through 'life together', figuring out how to 'be' here and love people deeply elsewhere. I'm also struggling to embrace my limits, my emotional and physical limits. I have been deeply challenged by the Christian community I'm a part of here. I have been thinking about Mission, Community, Discipleship, and the Gospel. Two of my friends have participated in the meetings where the messages about those ideas were shared recently. I have been listening to the messages and have been talking to them about those ideas.